We’ve all thought about the possible scenario that was ever so popular in blockbusters: what would you do in a zombie apocalypse?
They’re coming for you, with dead eyes and gray skin. They ooze danger. You know, you’ve got to have a plan.
So, you pick your top people to have on your side and strategize the best way to deal with those ever-so-dangerous zombies that threaten your life, trying to bring you with them to the other side.
While you may have prepared for a zombie apocalypse, you probably haven’t prepared for one in your dating life.
That’s right, zombie dating is all the craze and it’s almost as startling as the real thing.
What is zombie dating? And how should you deal with it?
What is zombie dating?
You’re returning from your morning run, jamming to your “getting ready” Spotify playlist, and preparing for the day when a message from a name you’d tried to forget appears. You curiously open it.
“Hey, how’s it going?”
And just like that, the guy who left you confused, angry, and heartbroken a few months ago decides to pop back into your life as though he’d never disappeared without a word in the first place.
That’s a zombie! Scary, I know.
We’re all familiar with the term “ghosting” in dating. If you’re fortunate enough to not know the term, having never had it happen to you, then consider yourself lucky.
Ghosting is when you hit it off with someone, maybe even go on a few dates, and then they just disappear.
No returned messages, no explanations, just POOF, gone into the night, never to return.
Or so you think… Enter zombies!
Zombies are those shameless ghosts who decide to reappear in your life, with no mention of why they ghosted you in the first place.
If it’s yet to happen to you, then prepare yourself for what’s to come because, unfortunately, where there are ghosts, there will always be zombies.
Why is zombie-ing a thing?
There are many reasons why zombies are prevalent in today’s dating culture. Since ghosting is now such a normalized part of dating life, zombies were always bound to appear. Some ghosts just won’t disappear forever, even if they probably should.
The fast-paced and technology-forward dating trends of today make it easier and easier for people to become zombies.
After all, for the emotionally immature, it’s much easier to disappear, return, and never address the issue—all from behind a screen rather than having a conversation.
But let’s check out what specifically makes our ghosts effortlessly transform into zombies.
They crave constant attention
We know that one of the reasons some people ghost is because they are dating multiple people. They decide to pursue a different relationship and just vanish without a word.
Well, what happens when those other relationships die out? Unfortunately, a zombie is born.
Your ghost needs someone to date at all times, and when things slow down in their dating life, they start looking at their old contact list.
Some people don’t do well on their own. Maybe you know the feeling: no dating prospects, boredom settles in, and you look for some comfort from past relationships or flings.
It’s not ideal, but we’ve probably all done it.
However, if you ghost someone, it’s wrong to think they’ve left that door open. It’s a traumatic thing for people to forgive and move past.
Zombies decide it’s best not to address the mysterious and insensitive disappearing act they pulled. They reappear without a word about it. That’s easier, right?
Zombies shamelessly walk around spooking their past ghosting victims.
Why?
Probably not because they’re interested, but because they’re bored or lonely and longing for attention.
Technology makes it easier
We can probably all agree that technology is great. It’s made our lives a lot easier in the grand scheme of things. It’s helped us to become more globally connected, broadening our experiences and worldviews.
But it’s also made dating life pretty vapid. We’re used to swiping through a sea of faces and deciding whether or not they’re worth our time based on a picture.
People make dating decisions in seconds! Maybe, if you’re lucky, they read your bio to know what you like or what you do.
It’s creating a dating world of instant gratification, which has prompted ghosts and zombies to be the norm.
We’ve become used to building relationships through a screen. Those relationships have also become more easily disposable for certain people. Just block a number, uninstall an app, or simply ignore messages.
It’s much more difficult to end things with someone in person rather than just disappearing. It also makes it easier to reappear in their life.
You feel less nervous about an in-person rejection. After all, it’s not real life, but a mere screen.
Or at least that’s the possible justification for a ghost or a zombie.
Whatever their reasoning, technology has most certainly made it easier for zombies to make their bold reappearances, spooking the balance out of your dating life.
How to handle a zombie
Alright, let’s get you prepared for zombies in your dating life. If you haven’t had an incident yet, then you likely will.
So, what’s the best way to deal with a zombie? And no, it’s probably not stocking up on dried goods until they come banging down your door.
Call them out
The scariest thing about a zombie is that they have completely ignored the terrible thing they did in the first place: ghosting you.
Don’t let the zombie get away with it.
Make sure you bring it up. Boldly respond to that out of the blue message with a, “Hey, things have been great. Why was it that you ghosted me in the first place?”
Or some version of that that works for you.
We’ve all been told since kindergarten (or before) that our actions have repercussions. Make this zombie face what they’ve done. Or at least scare them into being a ghost again in the process.
If our zombies can’t be bothered to deal with what they didn’t face before, then no need to even toy with the idea of letting them back into your life.
Let them in or send them back to the dating grave
Now it’s time for you to decide. The choice is yours if you want to deal with this person anymore.
However, if they didn’t address their spooky disappearance after you called them out on it, I would close that dating door for sure.
If they have, then maybe you’ve got some things to think about.
Giving them another chance
Your zombie has accepted responsibility for what they’ve done. They accepted the fault and maybe you found their reasoning acceptable enough to ponder getting back into something with them.
Sometimes it’s hard to click with someone. If you like them, and it feels genuine, then give the relationship another chance. It may be a risk, but you know what you can and can’t handle.
Remember, if you decide to give it another try, you’ll have to truly forgive the incident. It won’t help to constantly bring it up or be incessantly paranoid about it happening again.
Saying goodbye, for good
Maybe your zombie couldn’t fess up to the error in their ways when they first disappeared. It’s time to say goodbye.
Being able to admit when you’re wrong is an important quality in relationships. No one wants a headstrong zombie messing up their life.
Maybe your zombie did accept fault, but you just can’t get past the incident. Guess what? You don’t have to. If you no longer trust this person, then it’s better to leave them in the past.
Remember, there is a likely chance that you’ve got a serial zombie on your hands. This could be their dating style.
You don’t need to risk another ghosting incident with them. Your emotional well-being is the most important thing. If they mess with that, then say goodbye before they have a chance to fully come back to life.
Zombies are here to stay
Unfortunately, it seems that zombie dating is a trend that is likely to hang around. Where there are ghosts, there will be zombies. Prepare yourself for a zombie incident.
You most likely don’t have some magic zombie potion that turns them into emotionally mature human beings. But, maybe zombies really can change.
The best bet is usually to send zombies back to the grave. However, you know what you can and can’t handle.
In the end, it’s up to you what you want to do when that spooky scene reappears in your life: embrace the scary movie or flee the cinema.