As a single looking for a partner, you can meet a potential match at a speed dating event and proceed to a serious relationship.
Some of the most beautiful love stories out there began with speed dating, and you too can be the next person in line.
However, to have a successful experience, you should know how to go about speed dating and maximize your chance of meeting a partner.
This article guides you on how to do speed dating to help you get good at it and increase your chances of meeting a match.
But before that, let’s understand what speed dating is and how it works.
Let’s get started!
What is Speed Dating?
Speed dating is a social activity run by organizations where singles looking for romantic partners meet and interact with each other for a certain short duration (often 3–5 minutes) set by the organization running the event.
Depending on the plan, one gender rotates and interacts with the other gender for the set duration, and the organizer signals a new rotation when the time limit is reached.
For example, there would be five women and fifteen men, so the women would remain in a fixed position while the men rotated to interact with each woman for five minutes.
So each man has an equal chance to interact with every woman at a five-minute interval.
The purpose of speed dating is to determine if there is a mutual interest between singles, and if there is, depending on the organization running the event, they facilitate the exchange of contacts and pursue the interest further.
Participants attending the event pay to attend, so the organizer is running a business. However, some organizations spare one gender from paying, so you might find a speed dating event where only males are paying to meet females.
These events are widely advertised by the organizations running them to attract singles from different locations.
How to Do Speed Dating
Don’t know how to go about speed dating? Follow this guide:
1. Find a good speed dating event
There are numerous speed dating organizers out there. You just have to find one near your area. Try googling “speed dating events near me” or adding your location after the term “speed dating” in search engines.
But though you can easily find these events, they don’t operate the same way. They have different time intervals, and age limits, and charge differently.
As such, do your research to find one that suits your needs. You can even contact the event planners and ask questions to get more details. This ensures you have enough information in your hands to pick the best event.
2. Prepare for the event
You should know how speed dating works so you can prepare. And with the gathered information, you can prepare accordingly.
I assume by now you know how the event you’ve settled on will operate. Things like age, the expected number of singles, the set time for interaction, and who will be rotating
So if you’re a guy and you’ve learned that males will be rotating to interact with females, you should move fast enough so you get to spend all the time interacting.
In addition, have questions in mind that will help you get the most information about a person in the shortest time possible. The idea behind these events is to gather as much as possible within a certain duration.
If you struggle with conversation, practice with the people you interact with daily so you don’t waste time during the event.
3. Dress nicely but don’t overdo
You’re going on several first dates at once. So, in the same way, you would dress up on your first date, put in the effort, and dress nicely.
Groom well; wear a subtle cologne, but don’t overdo it such that it disturbs others in the room.
Pick a cute but comfortable outfit, as you don’t want to be uncomfortable during the event. I suggest wearing something you’ve worn before so you’re familiar with the level of comfort.
And if you must get a new outfit, do this way before the event and wear it for a day so you know the ins and outs of it.
The idea should be to look nice but be comfortable as well.
4. Avoid asking the usual questions
As I said, you will have a maximum of maybe five minutes to interact with each person. As such, you should maximize this short duration to get enough relevant details to evaluate a mutual interest between you and the other person.
So ask useful questions and not the usual general ones. These are the questions you should have worked on during your preparation.
A trick is to find a question that covers different aspects of someone’s life. For example, if you ask someone how their day was, you’re likely to learn where they work, their profession, as well as where they live from the answer to this one question.
You might also pick their interests as they answer the question.
5. Be polite and friendly
Even if you had a bad day, don’t let it ruin the event. Be polite and friendly to every person you interact with, regardless of your feelings towards them.
So don’t let someone feel you don’t like them from how you talk to them. Try to maintain your cool, even if they provoke your emotions.
To achieve this, go to the event expecting to interact with different personalities. Just like you meet good and bad people in your everyday life, you’re likely to encounter such personalities at the event.
When you know this, you’ll be less disappointed and know how to go about it.
6. Loosen up
You’re not closing any life-changing deals here, so loosen up a little. After all, it’s never that serious.
Besides, being strict won’t get you what you want. It might scare some people away by portraying a person you’re not.
Try to relax and have fun along the way. You’ll be in a more sociable mood when you relax and are more likely to attract potential matches.
What Do You Say During Speed Dating?
Anything interesting that will spark an engaging conversation Avoid generic questions, as they are not only boring but you also get little information from them.
Say random things that are out of the ordinary. For example, you can ask if they’ve ever been arrested or fired from a job.
They won’t expect such questions, and they are kind of interesting, so they are likely to make the conversation engaging.
You can also try “cold reading,” where you make an assumption about them. For example, you can say they look adventurous or seem like they enjoy dancing.
Give them time to respond, and you will learn things about them along the way.
Don’t use pick-up lines or ask the usual boring questions. Be mysterious, and if you can, make them talk more about themselves. That’s how you learn their interests.
I’m not saying you don’t answer their questions about you. Ask them thoroughly but briefly, then return to your original question. You already know yourself, so maximize your learning about them.
It’s up to them to find out about you, but you can also help them learn more about you by answering the question first before asking them.
For example, I like swimming and engaging in adventurous activities. Do you do anything adventurous for fun?
Just find exciting things to talk about.
How Do You Get Good at Speed Dating Events?
Before attending the event, practice conversing with anyone and everyone around you. Whether it’s your workmate or the lady at your local grocery store, engage them and practice making conversation.
Attend more speed dating events and use the tactics you’ve learned to engage the other person. Perfect your skills as you go. If you notice something that didn’t work this time, improve it for next time.
Also, don’t go to these events unprepared. Do thorough research and gather as much info as possible to make your interactions smooth.
And finally, don’t go there with too many expectations. Avoid putting pressure on yourself and see speed dating as a social fun activity.
Speed dating is no rocket science. Almost anyone can try it and the more you do, the more you get good at it.
Use this guide to practice speed dating and hopefully you meet your perfect match in these events.
All the best!