“When you truly love someone, age doesn’t matter. Whether it’s a difference of 2 or 30 years, love is love.”
Besides, age is just a number, right?
There are a lot of controversies regarding age differences in relationships. Traditionally, people held that a man should be a few years older than a woman.
But how many are a few? You’ll still face stereotypes if your man is ten years older than you, and they’ll be even worse if you’re older than him. Whether there’s a difference of 2 or 10 years, people will still talk.
So, imagine dating someone twice your age; whether you’re the man or woman in the relationship, there will be stares and talks behind your back.
Some will even say it to your face. But that aside, is dating someone twice your age okay?
Let’s find out.
Dating Someone Twice Your Age: The Reality
If you’re 20, that means you’re dating someone who is 40. Whether it’s right or wrong, at least you’re both adults and consenting to a relationship.
But if you’re a 16 or 17-year-old dating someone twice your age, that’s wrong, especially if your relationship involves sexual conduct.
Assuming you’re both adults, there are always double standards depending on age. For example, a 25-year-old female dating a 50-year-old man is said to have “daddy issues,” but there is no such thing as “daughter issues” for the man.
I feel like men have an easier time dating younger or older women than females. Even if the above scenario were reversed, so the woman was 50, she would have a more challenging time than the 25-year-old male.
Forget the stereotypes; the reality is you’ll always be in different stages of life. And again, the issue of gender is still a thing.
Think about it: If you’re a 25-year-old male who’s always wanted kids, you can’t have that when dating a woman twice your age. So unless you’re dating her for the thrill of it, you’ll either have to compromise or break up with her.
But if the situation were reversed, a 25-year-old female would have a chance to have kids with a 50-year-old male. However, it’s not a guarantee either, especially if the man already has older kids.
Such a man might not want more kids at his age.
Dating Someone Twice Your Age: Advantages & Disadvantages
Dating someone twice your age has its advantages and disadvantages. Some include the following:
Advantages of dating someone twice your age
They might be financially secure
Of course, they are at a better stage in their career than you. They are probably directors or managers of a reputable company.
That means they are financially secure, especially if they invested wisely in their early years. As a partner, you get to enjoy financial benefits like luxurious trips and dates in the nicest restaurants.
If you’re lucky, your date might help you create more wealth with their money, especially if your relationship is serious.
They will help you make better decisions
Experience is the best teacher, and since your older date has experienced more than you, they know better. As such, they will help you make better life decisions, both career-wise and in other ways.
They will also likely support you in those decisions, making things a little easier for you. It will be like having a mentor to guide and hold your hand.
No time for games
You don’t expect someone who is fifty to act like a twenty-five-year-old. You often don’t have time for games when you get older because you’re busy chasing more important things.
Besides, you know what you want, so you get directly to it. That said, it’s not uncommon for your date to ask you to be their partner on the second or third date.
At least you know their love is genuine, as they don’t beat around the bush.
You’re likely to be treated right
An older person knows better and is likely to treat you better. They have learned from past relationships how to be a better person and treat others better.
Actually, most people in such relationships say they feel more valued and appreciated by their partners.
Disadvantages of dating someone twice your age
You don’t have much in common
As I said, you’re in different stages of life, so you have different interests. So while you want to go to a club and party like your agemates, your date wants to chill in the house, cuddling and talking throughout the night.
They might behave like your parent
An age gap of more than twenty years is no joke. Most likely, the person you are dating is about your parent’s age. They might even have kids almost your age.
It’s normal for such a person to act as your parent when correcting you. They might be overly protective and sometimes controlling.
You have to deal with their baggage
Chances are, your date is divorced, and we all know this comes with some emotional baggage. And even if they were never married, they are probably dealing with some personal issues from when they were single.
No matter how hard they try to hide it, such issues will eventually surface and may even destroy the relationship.
You’ll have to endure societal judgments
Dating an older person, let alone dating someone twice your age, carries a negative stigma in society. So be ready to deal with stares and judgmental eyes when holding hands in public.
It may even be your friends asking uncomfortable questions or your family judging you for dating someone old enough to be your parent.
Can Dating Someone Twice Your Age Lead to Marriage?
I’ll be honest; dating is one thing, but marriage is a whole different thing. But this doesn’t mean you can’t marry someone twice your age.
However, keep in mind that you’ll have to deal with more than the above disadvantages when you marry this person. Besides, what about your personal goals, like having kids?
Unless you don’t want kids, getting them with someone that old is almost impossible, especially if you’re a man.
Getting married to someone that old will change your life completely. It might not be in a bad way, but it’s definitely not the same as marrying someone your age.
But you won’t be the first one to do it; we’ve seen several people in our society do it, and they seem to live happily ever after, though we can’t really speak for them.
Also, some of these marriages end as soon as they begin. Maybe the parties involved realize things are more intense than they expected.
Dating someone twice your age can lead to marriage, but it’s not a decision you want to make hastily.
Dating someone twice your age can work, but it won’t be easy. However, if you are genuinely happy with this person, feel free to enjoy your experience with them.
Let things flow, and don’t overthink the future. If things are meant to be, they will be.
Besides, as Mark Twain said, “age is an issue of the mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.”