Feeling ignored by someone you love is the worst feeling ever! You feel frustrated, hurt, and confused.
Did I do something wrong? Is everything okay? All these questions keep ringing in your mind, and worst of all, you don’t know what to do.
I try retracing to when it all started, so I can come up with an explanation but end up more confused. So yes, I know the feeling, and no matter how perfect your relationship is, there are such moments.
Are you in that state right now? This post will tell you exactly what to say and how to respond when your boyfriend is ignoring you.
How to respond when he is ignoring you
Being ignored comes with a lot of negative emotions. You start feeling unworthy, unlovable, and less important.
This is someone you love and you look forward to telling how your day was and when you can’t, there is a void left in your heart.
Don’t ignore him, as this will only worsen the situation. Instead, respond by:
1. Communicating with him
Communication strengthens relationships. And though he is ignoring you, you need to understand why. Maybe he is just in a bad place and the only way to find out is to keep in touch.
Let him know you care. Reassure him of your love and tell him you are willing to talk things over.
2. Staying calm
This whole situation is draining and messes with your mental state. The secret is to remain calm so you don’t overreact and worsen things.
One time I couldn’t take it anymore, so I sent him a long text ranting out. Do you know what he did? He blue ticked, which hurt twice as much. Keeping it cool saves you a great deal.
3. Giving him time
Sometimes all he needs is a little space to think things over. Maybe he is going through something personal. I know it sucks; you expect to go through it together, but what if he doesn’t want to? Or that’s his coping mechanism?
4. Distracting yourself
You also have your own sanity to maintain through this horrible ordeal. Instead of paying attention to the negative energy, try doing things you love doing to avoid overthinking and obsessing over someone ignoring you.
Go for a date with your girls and do something fun. This reminds you of your worth, and trust me, you need it at such a time.
Things to say when he is ignoring you
Now that you know how to respond and want to keep in touch, what do you say? Whatever you say may mend or create more distance. And since you want to make things right, say these to him:
1. Send a short text
- How are you?
- What are you doing?
- How is everything?
It is safe as it shows you care and doesn’t sound desperate. And if he is ignoring because he is too busy, it reminds him he needs to keep in touch.
2. Remind him you are there for him
Since you don’t know the root of the silent treatment, it’s good to remind him you care and are always there for him. You can say something like:
- Whatever you are going through, we can go through it together.
- You know I’m always here for you, so please talk to me and let me help you.
Men are not so great at expressing their emotions, so a bit of compassion and reassurance may be just what he needs to turn around.
3. Send him a good morning text
You cannot go wrong with a good morning text. It is innocent and straightforward. Just send it even if he is ignoring you.
He will see it before a busy day and know he is still on your mind.
4. Remind him of your love
If you don’t want to go all the way out, a simple ‘I love you is okay. It reminds him you are precious; you are in love with him, and he is hurting you.
If he doesn’t respond to this, then it’s more serious and you need to know where you stand in all this.
5. Try other forms of communication
Sometimes a call works better than a text. He can feel you really care as you talk and may even open up.
Besides, this is better if you are unsure what to say via text. You get to judge by his tone if he is still into you and if he is okay.
6. Talk about the silent treatment
You have given him space and asked what is wrong, but it’s now a week of getting the cold treatment.
Ask him straight up about it. Tell him something like:
- I don’t know why you are ignoring me, so can we please talk about it?
- I want us to talk things through, so stop ignoring me.
However, be cautious to avoid getting into a heated argument.
7. Tell him what’s on your mind
Now that you have tried playing safe and it’s still not working, it’s better to let him know he is hurting you and you deserve to know what the problem is. Experts say the silent treatment is inflicting pain without physical bruising.
He could break up in silence, especially if the silent treatment takes too long. Explain your concerns, and let him know you are ready for the truth and deserve an explanation.
8. Wait for him to make the next move
At the end of the day, you both love each other and since you have played your part, wait for him to take action.
Let’s be honest; if you are still as special to him at this point, he should show it. You can’t be losing your sanity over someone who doesn’t care anymore.
According to Paul Schrodt, silent treatment damages a relationship. It interferes with healthy communication and creates negative energy. If he still wants you, he wouldn’t make it this far.
Reasons he may be ignoring you
You don’t just ignore someone you love for no reason. He may be ignoring you because:
1. He wants time alone
As I said, it might have nothing to do with you. Maybe he is going through a tough time and everything is overwhelming, so he needs time to think everything over.
2. You did something wrong
You said something unpleasant to him and instead of fighting over it or talking about it, he opts to ignore you. It’s not a good thing, but it is definitely a reason he may be ignoring you.
3. You are no longer a priority
When someone is no longer a priority, you don’t make an effort to be in their life. That’s precisely what he is doing.
Someone might have caught his attention and since he can’t tell you, the easier option is to ignore you and hope you ignore him back.
4. He is breaking up with you
Some men give a cold treatment as a sign of breaking up. Watch out for other signs and try to analyze recent events even before the silent treatment.
Were there frequent fights, blames, and a lot of misunderstandings? If yes, then the sad truth is he is tired and wants to break up.
You’ve come a long way so let’s wrap this up.
You now know how to respond to his cold treatment, what to say to him and why he may be ignoring you.
The idea is to be understanding, be there for him and try to find out what is happening without losing your sanity. Just give it your best and if he doesn’t respond, you will know you tried.