We’ve come a long way in terms of dating. We definitely can’t compare dating in the 1800s to dating in the present.
Can we call “whatever that was in the 1800s” dating? Marriage was more about childbearing and less about romance since families needed more members to help with the frontier workload.
Dating then must have been easier for Christians as people held tightly to moral values, and discipline was instilled at a young age, creating a favorable environment for Christianity to thrive.
Besides, unlike today, most traditions considered sex before marriage taboo. Now it’s not only a norm but also part of the package.
In all honesty, modern dating is filled with values that don’t align with the Christian faith.
So how do you navigate dating as a Christian man without jeopardizing your faith? This article covers Christian dating advice for guys that will help you date without compromising your values.
Read on to learn these dating hacks.
Dating as a Christian Guy
Dating as a Christian is not the same as dating as a non-Christian, and that’s how it should be because you must represent your faith in everything you do. Otherwise, you’re just talking the talk and not walking the walk.
“Galatians 5:25 If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit.”
“Colossians 1:10 so that you will walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, to please Him in all respects, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God;”
And don’t get me wrong; by different, I don’t mean boring.
It’s not uncommon to hear people, especially non-Christians, say that Christian values demanded in dating and relationships are impossible to achieve in current times.
While this is not true, it is understandable that they believe it because our society does not promote genuinely held Christian values. So unless you want to pretend everything is fine, many harsh stereotypes and unethical values can lead you to temptations.
Once you acknowledge this, you know what you are up against, and it’s easier to make a choice and prepare before you start your journey. Besides, you won’t be caught off guard because you made a choice and knew what to expect.
You should also know there are so many Christian men out there who don’t care about their faith values. As such, they will be swayed by whatever is done, whether it agrees with their convictions or not.
What I’m saying is that you shouldn’t compare yourself to others or try to imitate whatever is being done, even by other Christian men.
“3 John 1:11 Dear friend, do not imitate what is evil but what is good.”
Do things according to your convictions, and let the Word guide you on this journey.
Christian Dating Advice for Guys: 8 Tips to Dating Without Jeopardizing Your Faith
Dating is an exciting journey that can lead to meeting someone special to enjoy life with. But as a genuine Christian guy, you must be cautious as you navigate today’s dating world, as there may be temptations to lead you astray.
Here are some practical tips to help you have a fun dating experience that aligns with your beliefs.
Date women of your faith
Some people will find this harsh, but it is the hard reality. It’s already hard to maintain upright Christian values in a world full of temptations, and the last thing you need is to date someone who doesn’t share the same values as you.
You’ll be pulling against each other until one succeeds. I know you’re likely to win someone over to your side, but the probability is 50/50. And if you’re serious about your conviction, you can’t afford to leave things to chance.
“Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” – 2 Corinthians 6:14
Use well-known Christian dating sites
As a Christian man, you live in the same world as non-Christians. So you’re also juggling through life like everybody else. As such, there is no time to meet every Christian lady; that’s why it’s wise to utilize all available opportunities.
One such opportunity is online dating. I know there are reservations about online dating; that’s why I advocate using Christian dating sites. You should also know that not every woman on Christian dating sites is a true Christian.
It’s up to you to do your due diligence and choose wisely. You can start by being clear when creating your dating profile, probably mentioning that you are a Christian guy looking for a woman of the same faith.
It’s also worth noting that not all dating sites are legitimate; some are outright scams, so be careful as you cruise around.
Apply knowledge acquired from your faith
You’ve learned a lot about relationships from your faith. You even have several scriptures to guide you on this journey.
Use this knowledge to navigate modern dating, and don’t let people lead you astray. Strengthen your conviction with the ways you were taught, so you make faith-inspired decisions and avoid temptations.
Be clear about your intentions from day one
When you meet a Christian woman, make your intentions known from day one. As I said, there are Christians who don’t hold Christian values when it comes to dating. Besides, you might be of the same faith but hold different values.
That’s why it’s wise to be clear about your intentions and interests, so you know where the other person stands and whether you share the same values.
Acknowledge you are human
Just because you’re a Christian doesn’t mean you have tamed your intolerance or libido. Like all humans, you’re allowed to feel things, but how you react toward them makes the difference.
Acknowledging this saves you a lot of time and stress because you learn to avoid situations that may trigger reactions that compromise your values.
Only date when you’re ready
Christian teachings support dating for marriage. And it makes sense; you avoid a lot of temptations when you’re sure of what you want.
Don’t rush to date when you’re not ready. You might end up breaking other women’s hearts, which does not reflect well on your faith.
Besides, dating involves tons of emotions, and emotions are often a precursor to sexual relations. When dating for marriage, you’re mature enough to control your emotions because you’ve grown in your faith, and I assume you aren’t a teenager either.
Don’t date in secret
You are ready to settle down. That’s why you’re looking for a serious woman to commit to, so why hide it?
When you date in secret, you’re giving room to temptations. You don’t have to announce you’re dating in the church (which is not bad too), but letting your religious friends know is fine.
You can even seek a mentor you trust who shares the same values to guide you. It might be someone in a successful Christian marriage you admire or your preacher. But again, ensure you share the same beliefs so you’re not brainwashed.
Don’t forget to have fun!
Don’t get lost in expectations and rules and forget to have fun. Dating is supposed to be fun, and it can even be for a Christian guy like you.
You just have to find the right woman, and she will help you navigate the dating world in a fun way while maintaining your values.
How to Date Successfully as a Christian Man
Use the above tips but, most importantly, the knowledge acquired from Christian teachings. Also, work on yourself to be a better Christian—an honest man full of self-control.
Read books and scriptures that shape character, and don’t forget to maintain your relationship with your supreme being while looking for a worldly relationship.
Don’t be afraid to end futile relationships, but do it immediately before they interfere with your faith.
The best way to notice this is by being attentive at the start of every relationship and learning more about the women you meet.
You should also set reasonable expectations because, honestly, you won’t meet Mary, the mother of Jesus. Christians, like everyone else, make mistakes and fall prey to temptations, but the goal is to meet someone who has a genuine faith and a desire to be a better Christian.
I’m not saying you compromise on what you believe, but a minor human mistake that someone is willing to improve on shouldn’t be the reason you break up with them.
Lastly, don’t be too rigid and quick to judge.
Matthew 7:1 “Judge not, that you be not judged.”
Be patient enough with every Christian woman you meet and let things flow. You don’t need a long list of boxes to check and forced conversations.
With time, you will learn enough about her to make your decision.
Wrapping Up
Dating as a Christian guy might be challenging, especially since whoever you meet has different expectations for dating.
However, it is not impossible to date while maintaining the Christian values demanded in dating and relationships. You just have to acknowledge that, as a Christian, your journey is different from that of others.
As you date, make an effort to strengthen your faith and allow your faith to guide you. I hope you meet someone special to share your life with.
All the best!
